We’re all been there. Seriously. WE’VE ALL BEEN THERE. There’s not a person out there who hasn’t once made a New Year’s Resolution to get a little healthier, a little fitter, and a little hotter naked.
And if there was, it was probably Cara Delevingne’s, because she’s fucking #blessed with both genetics and a 12 year old’s metabolism.
I’ve definitely been there. And not just at New Years, either – how about every-other-Monday-morning, when I’m facing another week off sitting at a desk with yesterday’s hangover for company and a cafe that sells Glazed Doughnuts across the road. (Baker Bros., if anyone’s asking).
We wouldn’t keep making a generic resolution to get fit and healthy year after year if just making the resolution worked. The fact is, it doesn’t. It lies to make you THINK you’re doing something, when in actual fact you’re resolution disappears as soon as someone suggests beers when you were meant to be running. It’s the same mentality that means gyms have 5,000 memberships but only space for 50 people at a time.
As any idiot trying to flog his e-book will tell you, you have to set down realistic, achievable goals. Don’t be generic and try to get healthy, be specific and run 10km.
In light of all this, here are some actual, achievable, realistic health and fitness goals that you can set for 2015, like a twenty-somethings Pic n’ Mix.
1. Find a running buddy.
All that shit about running being easier with another person? It’s all true. Find a running buddy, and not one who’s more interested in a post-run brunch than the hard slog. Once you’ve got this shit locked down, the running bit gets easier.
2. Buy a healthy recipe book, then learn to make each recipe once a week.
Master five of them. Buy Gwyneth Paltrow’s It’s All Good, if you want. I won’t judge. And we all know that woman is a clean eating machine.
3. Find a fitness class you love.
Then go sign up for the next six months.
4. Or, choose a physical hobby you want to lean.
I don’t care if it’s scuba diving, surfing, or gardening – if it get’s you moving, it’s working. And so are you.
5. Get a list of superfoods and work out a meal or snack for each one.
Sure, you know kale and blueberries, but did you know about watermelon and salmon? Nutritionists advocate the small changes to your diet approach, if you want the weight to stay off. This is one way.
6. Learn to meditate, and schedule in time to do it.
Whether or not you believe the pseudo-science (and there is a lot of scientific backing to say meditation works wonders), taking five or thirty minutes out of every day to sit, reflect, and calm yourself cannot be a bad thing. There’s a lot of help out there with meditation, but to get you started, find a place in your home or nearby you can do it, make a schedule, then stick to it.
7. Sign up for a fun run happening this year.
Find a friend to do it with. Set yourself a goal, and let that friend keep you accountable.
8. Once a month, organise a catch up with friends that doesn’t have “consuming booze” as it’s main activity.
This is what brunches were made for, people! After a certain age, we’re all too awkward to hang out at a mate’s place without alcohol, anyway.
9. Buy yourself some new fitness gear.
Fuck it. You deserve it. And nothing makes you want to exercise more than knowing you’re looking hot doing it.
10. Aim to wake up one Sunday a month without a hangover.
This is mainly achievable by organising something jealousy-inducing in advance that you can ward off drink-hungry friends with. “Oh, sorry, I can’t stay late tonight. I’m running a market stall from 7am tomorrow selling shit that looks GREAT on Instagram.” Works every time.
11. Walk around the block at lunch time.
3.8 million Australians eat lunch at their desk every day. If this is you, and you don’t have time for an hour for lunch (c’mon, who does), then aim to walk around the block after you eat once a day. You’ll feel less bloated, more energised, and there’s something to be said for a little Vitamin D hit. Got that one down pat? Add in another walk around 3pm, when your afternoon sugar cravings kick in.
12. Floss. And not just when you have to visit the dentist.
It takes 21 days to create a habit. Make this one, and you’ll enjoy cleaner breath, reduced risk of gum disease (a risk factor for heart disease and diabetes, among other things), and a supreme sense of satisfaction when the dentist mumbles “And have you been flossing?” and you’re like, yeah bitch, I have been.
13. Quit smoking. C’mon. You know it’s time.
I appreciate that this shouldn’t be included in a list of easy New Year’s Resolutions, but: if there’s one change you can make to improve your health, fitness, finances, appearances, free time, whatever, then this is it. It’s hard. But if not now, then when? You got this.